BREAKDOWN

fucking overrated song but i dont fucking care-

never say never- the fray 

I HAD TO DO SOMETHING CREATIVE SO I WOULDN’T DO SOMETHING STUPID!!!!!!!!!!!

I’ve been so stressed lately. I don’t know why. My life is great. Probably for the first time since I remember. So why did these thoughts came back? It’s been a year now. A year since I wanted to end my life under that fucking vehicle. A year since I threw out that stupid green paper knife I kept in my room. A year since I started to care about me. If someone is reading this, don’t worry I’m doing fine now. It’s just I have gone through therapy, I have amazing friends, I have a supportive family, but today I felt the urge to do something to myself.

To cut

To bleed

To cry

To die

WHY? I DONT WANT TO DIE NOT YET SO

WHY THINK ABOUT THAT, WHY?!?!!??!????

my head is so messed up lately. I need love. I need appreciation. I need a hug, kiss, sleep, nice words and a rest. is it too much to ask? if so just tell me god if you are there (or someone else at this point i just simply dont care). FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUVK FUVK FUVK FUVCK FUAHSJSKSJDBEJJCK I HATE THIS STATE WHEN IM SO DEPRESSED I CANT EVEN CRY. WHERE ARE THE TEARS WHEN I NEED THEM. GO, FLOW, I NEED TO CRY AND LET ALL THE BAD THOUGHT ESCAPE MY BODY!!!!!!!!!!!! JUST. LET.ME.LIVE.

!